Sunday, October 30, 2011

Banana Cupcakes



I had some very mushy bananas and what better idea than to make banana cupcakes on a glorious Sunday? This recipe makes 12 muffins.


Ingredients
225g unsalted butter, softened
225g caster sugar
225g self-raising flour sifted
4 eggs
1/4 tsp nutmeg
225g mashed bananas
100g chocolate chips

Icing
200g cream cheese / mascarpone
175g icing sugar
1tsp vanilla essence
edible glitter, and decorations

How to:
1. Pre-heat an oven to 180C. Place baking cases in muffin tins.
2. Beat the butter until light and fluffy. Add the sugar , flour, eggs and nutmeg and beat until smooth.
3. Add the mashed bananas and chocolate chips.
4. Spoon the batter in the cases and bake for 20 minutes. Remove the muffins when cooked and allow to cool down.
5. To make the icing, slowly beat the cream cheese, icing sugar and vanilla essence together.
6. Swil or pipe the icing onto the cooled muffins and decorate with edible glitter and decorations.
7. EAT!

Thursday, October 20, 2011

The Meat Issue

I just read an article that got me thinking about what we eat. There is a huge debate / flame war going on out there and it's time I add my two cents worth regarding


OMNIVORES vs. VEGETARIANS vs. VEGANS


So lets get facts straight.


Omnivores eat everything. Veggies, starches, meat, fish and other animal products. I'm one of them. I thoroughly enjoy animal products.


Vegetarians fall in many categories. You have have the ones that will dairy products only , those that will eat fish only, those that will eat dairy and fish only.


And the Vegans, who will not eat ANY animal based product, or wear products made from animals (wool, leather, silk).


Then you have those on paleodo-diets who only eat veggies and meat. No grains. Apparently that's what our ancestors ate. I disagree. We certainly ate grains but only when in season, and veggies only in season and meat when we could catch it. The cave man did not have the best diet. Having done an Atkins diet (low carb high protein) once that viciously rebounded on me and messed up my entire metabolism, I can tell you Paleo is not the way to go.


So the whole debate people are having is that it's cruelty to animals to eat animals, bad for natural resources to do animal husbandry, bad for natural resources to destroy large tracts of land for mono-culture crops, that we have evolved to eat both vegetables and meat, that our digestive system is not geared to eat plant matter only etc. The list is endless.


So where do I, as an omnivore stand in all this? I do believe we are meant to eat animal protein. Our digestive system is not designed for pure vegetable diets. We haven't evolved that way. We digest meat-based iron better than plant based iron. And no, spinach is not very rich in iron. There are others plants that fare much better.


I'm not saying vegetarian diets are bad per say. Unfortunately many vegetarians don't quite consider what nutrients they need in order to be healthy and they get deficiencies and that's where the whole vegetarianism / veganism is bad for you argument comes from. I've known obese vegetarians because they predominantly ate starch. I've met on the verge of starvation vegetarians too. Not good. If you buy the correct books that tell you what plants have the right nutrients for you and how to balance your food, then you'll be a healthy vegetarian / vegan.


It's all about doing your research properly.


I think modern society consumes far too much meat. Fish is healthier, but you then have the dilemma of depleting the oceans resources and destroying marine ecosystems from poor fishing methods. Buy only from sustainable fishing practices. SASSI has a great booklet that will help you determine which fish you should buy.


The Meat-Free Monday is a good idea. But I recommend you extend it to every second day meat-free. There are many options to get protein: beans, chickpeas, soya (though soya monocultures are the reason for the destruction of the Amazon rainforest, so I say stay away from soya) and Quinoa.


It's all about balance. A bit of protein (the size of your palm), lots of veggies and fruit (the more colourful the better) and some starch. If you have a balanced diet you will not suffer from cholesterol, overweightness, heart disease...


Nuff said!


PS: Dear Vegans, let your babies have mother's milk. They need it more than your morals / ideals. Let them get mommy's antibodies, let them grow strong and healthy. Only when they are onto solids should you decide to go vegan on them. Don't forget the importance of omegas for their brain development too. Before you even think of bringing them up on vegan diet from day one go to your dietician and follow their advice. Seriously. It's for your baby's own good!

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

WARNING: May contain garlic

Yesterday I decided to harvest some of my home grown herbs and make my very own basil pesto. It was a huge success. I believe that had any vampires decided to have a go at me they would have disintegrated into sparkly dust.




Ingredients


Approx 50g basil (or rocket or both)


Crushed garlic (the quantity will depend if you are vampire hunting or having to go to work the next day)


Grated Parmesan (again, quantities at your discretion)


Pine nuts (or walnuts or pecan nuts)


Olive oil




Food blender is a must, be it a handheld one, or a snazzy one. Otherwise you can use a mortar and pestle and be at it for years. Your choice really.




Method


Whizz up the greens. Add the garlic, Parmesan and nuts. Whizz whizz whizz until you have a paste. Slowly add olive oil until you have the consistency you want.




That's it




Make pasta. Add pesto. Eat! OM NOM! NOM!




HEY PESTO!

Thursday, October 13, 2011

THE QUEEN HAS SENT AN EMAIL

Email from the Queen - An important announcement regarding the USA




To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

In light of your immediate failure to financially manage yourselves and also in recent years your tendency to elect incompetent Presidents of the USA and therefore not able to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)



Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas, which she does not fancy).Your new Prime Minister, David Cameron, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated sometime next year to determine whether any of you noticed.


To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:



  1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary').


  2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'


  3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.


  4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.


  5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.


  6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.


  7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.


  8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.


  9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. New Zealand beer is also acceptable, as New Zealand is pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.


  10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialogue in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.


  11. You will cease playing American football. There are only two kinds of proper football; one you call soccer, and rugby (dominated by the New Zealanders). Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).


  12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the Australians (World dominators) first to take the sting out of their deliveries.


  13. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.


  14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).


  15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.

God Save the Queen!

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

GROSS!

This is what Jodie Marsh now looks like.




Is that a human being? Is it a coconut stuffed handbag? What happened to that gorgous buxom feminine body of hers? And what is with that spray tan colour? Goose shit green?


And please, someone explain to me how, in any universe a body builder could in any shape way or form look appealing. Toned bodies are nice, but oily, shit-coloured coconut stuffed handbags / matresses? Really?


What's your verdict?

HOT or VROT